A few years back, I wrote the following april fools joke and sent it to various ABC No Rio mailing lists. Some of the reactions were really great.
Being that it is april 1, I thought I'd use this as an excuse to remind all of you that ABC No Rio really needs your money.
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April 1 2003:
ABC No Rio Announces New And Important Policy Changes
Due to the rapidly changing neighborhood and new political climate the following changes will be instituted immediately:
* The saturday afternoon hardcore punk all-ages matinee will be replaced by the new all-ages bingo game and prayer circle
* Sunday poetry readings will be replaced by the sunday afternoon wine and cheese brunch (competitively priced at $25/plate)
* The Zine Library will soon be renovated as a joint Starbucks / Barnes & Noble reading room/cafe
* To avoid the potential misunderstanding and association with terrorism, Food not Bombs will change its name to Food not Islam or Food not Bad Things
* The Darkroom, Printshop and Computer Center have been annexed by Kinkos. Fees will be raised to the appropriate levels.
* All artwork and leaflets will be sent to the Department of Homeland Security for review and comment before being displayed.
* Musicians performing at COMA, No Rio's series of experimental and improvisational music, will now be limit themselves to performing covers of Kenny G. songs
* Politically controversial meetings that take place in the building will be video-taped for security purposes (these tapes will be shared at any time with local law-enforcement personnel)
* The ABC No Rio slogan "Culture of opposition Since 1980" will now be "Culture of Accommodation Since 2003"
AND... there will be no smoking or drinking anywhere in the building at any time for any reason!
Thanks for your cooperation while we go through these growing pains.
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Yes folks, this is april fools day... but without your support abc no rio will cease to exist and that's no joke!
LOL! How come I didn't get
LOL! How come I didn't get this before? This made my day. Thanks Eric!
are you real or a well designed spam bot?
I removed the link to the credit report service (same link I've removed on other spamish comments recently), but I'm leaving the comment because it just might be for real. Are you human? paid spammer? bot?